Singleton Street
Hello my lovely readers – I trust you are all well. Today I’ve decided to entertain you by way of a story titled “Singleton Street”. I feel the best way to describe my predicament is by location as opposed to situation.
Today I denounce by position of Social Secretary of the Singleton Street Residence Association and vacate my office for a younger more suitable candidate. I make this assertion because I am sick and tired of being sick and tired of being single. I am trapped between these two schools of thought – the first being “God is in control” and the second – “what are you doing to make that change/transition”. To avoid sounding too monolithic I will proceed with my emblematic accolade.
I must admit that when I moved into this one bedroom self contained 1st floor flat at 1 singleton street it was only for a sort while. My initial tenancy agreement was for 6 months – just while I got my act together and settled into university life. I had planned to find something abit more suitable and spacious preferably with a newly installed kitchen and a well-kept garden. But 3 years on – I am beginning to wonder why relocation has proved difficult. During my stay serving on the association I have had the pleasure of meeting and spending time with an assortment of residents. Many of which moved out but returned and some of which like me tried to sell up but to no avail. As the Social Sec I organise a variety of activities and functions – the most popular being the Pity Party (need I say more).
However I am beginning to feel dissatisfied with my present abode. I too want to change status and be counted amount my counterparts living in Coupleville. The question here is how do I go about doing this? How do I land myself a hot new property that daily appreciates in value? I sought to find the answer vide a variety of means including literature and mentoring some of which I would share with you know.
First of all you need to devise a plan – write your vision and make it plain. What are you looking for? If you cant truthfully answer that then at least seek to identify what you definitely don’t want. Make a clear distinction between the MUSTs and the MAYs. What must it have or in my case what must it not have – and what may it have and what may it not have.
Let us abandon the analogy for a moment and get serious – I’ll complete the story at a later date if you ask nicely . . . . But for next week’s entry I need your help. Copy and paste this grid below into the comment box and leave me your responses – it would help me with my research into this area and may help you too in finding, offering, accepting and closing a lucrative property proposal.
*****Delete as applicable: And please lets be honest with ourselves – I know we can work through this together.
Grid*****
1. Are you resentful that you are single? Y N
2. Are you trying to fix the fact that you are single? Y N
3. Are you embarrassed that you are single? Y N
4. Have you been tempted to resort to clubbing,
Partying, etc. to meet other people in the hope for finding your
Husband or Wife? Y N
5. Are you anxious and agitated about being single? Y N
6. Does pressure from others about getting married make you
Anxious? Y N
7. Are you tolerating single hood and can not wait for it to end? Y N
8. Do you go on dates because of fear of singleness? Y N
9. Are you afraid of marriage because your parents divorced? Y N
10. Do you find yourself complaining about the fact that you are single
often? Y N
21 comments:
I'M FIRST!!!..Damn I just had to go there!!!
Anyways loving the write up Suzy Peaches...
Honestly from the sound of things you are happy living on Singleton Street..the free and fast life…living your life on the fast lane sends thrills down your spine,lets not even talk about the almighty commitment that could lead to u possible upgrading to Coupleville.
Madam until I begin to see some action physically.verbally and what have u..u will fail to convince me of your dissatisfaction of your present abode.
Yes oh we have all at one point in our lives drawn up a MUST/MAY list..of our fictional prince charming that never seems to ride in on that trojan white house.
Let me stop there and take a breather..here are the answers to your grid.
1. Are you resentful that you are single? N
2. Are you trying to fix the fact that you are single? Y
3. Are you embarrassed that you are single? N
4. Have you been tempted to resort to clubbing,Partying, etc. to meet other people in the hope for finding your Husband or Wife? Y
5. Are you anxious and agitated about being single? Y
6. Does pressure from others about getting married make you Anxious? Y
7. Are you tolerating single hood and can not wait for it to end? Y
8. Do you go on dates because of fear of singleness? N
9. Are you afraid of marriage because your parents divorced? N
10. Do you find yourself complaining about the fact that you are single
often? N
Are you resentful that you are single? No
2. Are you trying to fix the fact that you are single? Yes
3. Are you embarrassed that you are single? No
4. Have you been tempted to resort to clubbing,
Partying, etc. to meet other people in the hope for finding your
Husband or Wife? Yes
5. Are you anxious and agitated about being single? No
6. Does pressure from others about getting married make you
Anxious? No
7. Are you tolerating single hood and can not wait for it to end? Yes, we all want to find that special someone
8. Do you go on dates because of fear of singleness? No, wrong reason to go on a date
9. Are you afraid of marriage because your parents divorced? No
10. Do you find yourself complaining about the fact that you are single
often? Yes, i complain sometimes
1 - N
2 - Y (but not rushing)
3 - HN (hell no, just had to personalise it hehe)
4 - Y but for other reasons
5 - N
6 - Y/N (sometimes is what I really wanted to put)
7 - Y (yaya)
8 - N (I go cos I'm the sh*t)
9 - N (not applicable)
10 - Y (but at times I say I'm happy I am)
However we all wish to find that special someone whom we will settle with. Some a bit more anxious than others but with the hope that we will all get to Stage 4 some day :o)
1. Are you resentful that you are single? N
2. Are you trying to fix the fact that you are single? Not really
3. Are you embarrassed that you are single? N
4. Have you been tempted to resort to clubbing,
Partying, etc. to meet other people in the hope for finding your
Husband or Wife? N
5. Are you anxious and agitated about being single? N
6. Does pressure from others about getting married make you
Anxious? Sometimes
7. Are you tolerating single hood and can not wait for it to end? Y
8. Do you go on dates because of fear of singleness? N
9. Are you afraid of marriage because your parents divorced? N (N/A)
10. Do you find yourself complaining about the fact that you are single
often? Y sometimes
I would do a list but all my answers are no. Yes I know typical guy nonsense. Anywahy, congrats on keeping the analogy going all the way through. Much Impressed.
Whay ay!!Suzy Peaches,great post oh...as for the list,all my answers are no?...uhmm does that make me cold in a way?;-)
This single thing in serious oh!!
LOL! The analogy had me rolling... Nice one Suzy...My answer to all ur questions is "No"...
1. Are you resentful that you are single? Y
2. Are you trying to fix the fact that you are single? Y
3. Are you embarrassed that you are single? N
4. Have you been tempted to resort to clubbing,
Partying, etc. to meet other people in the hope for finding your
Husband or Wife? N
5. Are you anxious and agitated about being single? Y
6. Does pressure from others about getting married make you
Anxious? Y
7. Are you tolerating single hood and can not wait for it to end? Y
8. Do you go on dates because of fear of singleness? N
9. Are you afraid of marriage because your parents divorced? N
10. Do you find yourself complaining about the fact that you are single
often? Y
1. Are you resentful that you are single? Y N
2. Are you trying to fix the fact that you are single? Y N
3. Are you embarrassed that you are single? Y N
4. Have you been tempted to resort to clubbing,
Partying, etc. to meet other people in the hope for finding your
Husband or Wife? Y N
5. Are you anxious and agitated about being single? Y N
6. Does pressure from others about getting married make you
Anxious? Y N
7. Are you tolerating single hood and can not wait for it to end? Y N
8. Do you go on dates because of fear of singleness? Y N
9. Are you afraid of marriage because your parents divorced? Y N
10. Do you find yourself complaining about the fact that you are single
often? Y N
oh mistake. silly me i'll do it again
1. Are you resentful that you are single? N
2. Are you trying to fix the fact that you are single? N
3. Are you embarrassed that you are single? N
4. Have you been tempted to resort to clubbing,
Partying, etc. to meet other people in the hope for finding your
Husband or Wife? Y
5. Are you anxious and agitated about being single? N
6. Does pressure from others about getting married make you
Anxious? Y
7. Are you tolerating single hood and can not wait for it to end? Y
8. Do you go on dates because of fear of singleness? N
9. Are you afraid of marriage because your parents divorced? N
10. Do you find yourself complaining about the fact that you are single
often? Y/N
But all this depends on the day you ask darling xxx
P.s. i uploaded the post for suzy, shes out of office at the mo...i hope she likes the random singletons pic hehehehe - they are a gospel group actually - RANDOM!
Hi honies,
I'm back now - been attending interviews really boring stuff. By Gods grace i'll find something soon.
Neways interesting answers. Keep them comming, i'm already working on my next blog entry - so watch this space.
PS: Nice picture Aramide. Can't say I could have done any better. Thanks
Time and chance will happen to all. God is still in control, and stop looking at what you don't have. Refocus you attention on God. Before you know it, the "one" will be right before your eyes. Until then you will just be complaining and grumbling like the people did when God sent them out of Egypt. You can make this a fast process or a slow one. CHOOSE. So you think you got it together? (I'm asking in general). Well then ask the Lord what may be hindering this process to be brought forth. Are you still carrying around dead weight? (unforgiveness, pain, anger, hate, bitterness, confusion, strife, etc..) towards friends,family, self, ex'x and even God??? Release it all, release those people and past hurt and pain. Are you hands clean, heart pure?
Some may need to do spirtual cleaning in your home.
Remember, God is a God of order. He's not going to present your true love to you while you a Hot Mess!! Let that stuff die, that junk die, cuz it's not profitable to the relationship. If there's anything dead in your life it needs to be cut off. Ask God to pour more of His love, mercy, and grace into your heart for this season of singleness. Before you know it, God will send the one who He has predestined for you to be with. Next thing you know, you will be blogging about, "How do you juggle being a wife, mother, and business owner?" *SMILE*
Preach it lady a...nicely put o!!
@ Lady A - I am really feeling you. The Spritual Outlook is ultimately what I was biulding up to. You have kinda stolen my thunder seeing I was going to explore that it the next couple of weeks. But thank you all the same - its always good too look at things through the eyes of God.
Keep it comming!
First up, I love the questionnaire...very probing!
Second, Lady A! Wow...u hit the nail on the head! Infact, no joke..I have to print your comment for reference. I think it relates not just to single people but people thinking about taking their relationship to the next level, I am not ven talking bout the dreaded M word but trying to be more serious and committed.
I believe look inward, what about you? write all the things u need in a partner then ask yourself? do you have those things. E.g I used to say...ohhh I want a guy with a strong relationship with God when my relationship with God was rather dodgy so I had to change that...etc...
Anyways, enjoy being single, find yourself and you will find HIM. AMEN
Damsel, Poet and Lyricist
I am very pleased that “God is in control” is at least an option. The issue is (as quoted in the book of Revelations) a person can either be hot or cold when it comes to God. But lukewarmness hardly gets you anywhere. To say God is control means accepting that you may not always understand why things are the way they are. However it is the only way we can exercise our faith. You only have to take a look around you to realise that relationships and even marriage does not always bring joy. It is those who wait on God that acquire favour from him. It those who seek God that sparkle as a result of his grace. In other words let your “pursuit of happiness” be focused on seeking what is true for it is written ‘seek ye first, the kingdom of God…’ It is true that things are easier said than done but what you let yourself believe will continue to dominate your desires. Finally what you want is not always necessarily what you need. Allow God the time (as in this period) to mold you into the perfect wife he has ordained you to be.
Pink Panther
It is unfortunate that the Nigerian society makes it seem that you have a disease if you are not married and popping babies at a certain age or at least in a relationship. Even parents seem to forget ‘God’s time’. Parents encourage their children (both men and ladies alike) to get into relationships in order to acquire an apparent state of security and normality. We have therefore been trained to believe that ‘the ‘m’ word must occur at a certain age. Is this not the cause of so many broken homes??? It almost seems like women especially are expected to accept the burden of unhappiness and uncertainty associated with majority of marriages. What I have observed, seen and heard as a Nigerian young lady means the sanctity of marriage and relationships is slowly loosing value in my eyes. It is clear that this is definitely not God’s intention for us. It is important that we uphold the values of God and not the presumptions of society. I have to agree that everything including relationships and marriages should be directed by God and him alone.
In relation to your grid both sistas say no to all…
@ Suzy Peaches: Enlightening, this post is very indicative of situations majority of people are faced with…. But are unable to share…
1. Are you resentful that you are single? Y
2. Are you trying to fix the fact that you are single? Y
3. Are you embarrassed that you are single? N
4. Have you been tempted to resort to clubbing,
Partying, etc. to meet other people in the hope for finding your
Husband or Wife? Y
5. Are you anxious and agitated about being single? Y
6. Does pressure from others about getting married make you
Anxious? N
7. Are you tolerating single hood and can not wait for it to end? N
8. Do you go on dates because of fear of singleness? N
9. Are you afraid of marriage because your parents divorced? Y
10. Do you find yourself complaining about the fact that you are single
often? Y
1. Are you resentful that you are single? Y
2. Are you trying to fix the fact that you are single? Y
3. Are you embarrassed that you are single? Y
4. Have you been tempted to resort to clubbing,
Partying, etc. to meet other people in the hope for finding your
Husband or Wife? N
5. Are you anxious and agitated about being single? Y
6. Does pressure from others about getting married make you
Anxious? N
7. Are you tolerating single hood and can not wait for it to end? Y
8. Do you go on dates because of fear of singleness? N
9. Are you afraid of marriage because your parents divorced? NOT APPLICABLE
10. Do you find yourself complaining about the fact that you are single
often? Y
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