Suzy Peaches

It seems she is simultaneously trying to make a comeback as I am making mine. Well, she beat me to it so we have a post. However, I'd like to point out that for someone who has been M.I.A longer than me, she really insisted I uploaded her post ASAP and asked me not to slay her off in my commentary.

Now why would I do that? When I have you guys hehehe. I bring you her 8th issue.

Is Love an Emotion or a Decision?

Hello my lovely Readers,
I trust you are well. I’m going to refrain from doing the usual “I’m so sorry I haven’t been in blogging because I’ve been really busy” bewail and go straight to the point.

Today’s title was inspired by a conversation I had two days ago. Just to summarise – We were conversing about typical male/female stereotypes. E.g. Nigerian women believing that all men cheat and go into relationships with so much distrust which leaves men with no choice but to live up to their expectation to cheating - blah blah blah.

Then this scenario was brought to the table- “If you had 3 suitors you really liked how would you decide on which one to pick? What would you consider?

I explained that my approach would be to write a list of my musts & mays (see Singleton Street for more details). And also key attributes and then whittle them down. Reasoning: How can you make a decision on a potential life partner without careful and thorough consideration – hmmm!

To defend the above statement I said “It depends on how you look at it. I think with my head and not my heart. Because I feel it is easier to bring your head into alignment with your heart than the other way round.”

And then the question was raised is love a decision or an emotion?

Argument ensued . . . no it isn’t – yes it is . . . With a bit more words but that was the general gist.

Since then I’ve been mulling over the question and I’m hoping you could help too. I think it’s a decision - Am I too rational when it comes to matters of the heart? Or can this approach really work? But more particularly I’m asking you today - Is love an emotion or a decision?

I really do believe that you choose to love who you want – and even though it may have started as a heart thing you daily need to reinforce or should I say remind yourself of why you are in that relationship. If the later is true then am I vindicated on my Decision thesis? If you decide to love someone can’t you decide not to? ***Please Advise.***

Suzy Peaches' Fruit Basket (Issue #7)

Easter

Hello everyone,

How have you been? – I’ve been very well thank you. I hope the words I share in this month of April will be fitting for season. Following on in our quest for love and seeing that it’s Easter I decided describe God’s archtype for love.

Easter has become so commercialised that its essence has been removed and replaced with chocolates and bunny rabbits. Regrettably the truth is Christians are just as guilty as unbelievers in our approach towards the season. I can’t speak for everyone by since I’ve started working full time Easter for me is a few days off work - A holiday I long for.

This post serves as a reminder to me that Easter is more than just a holiday, more than a time of solemn contemplation about the death and resurrection of Jesus but rather an acknowledgement of GOD’S INDESCRIBABLE LOVE FOR US’.

· A love that guarantees us life;
· A love that takes all, bears all and asks for nothing in return;
· A love like none other;
· The greatest love of all coupled with the greatest sacrifice of all;
· The love that gave itself up as proof of its existence;
· The love my heart pants for.

In this demonstration of Love I find newness of life and an abundance of Joy. Easter should be a time of Celebration – Celebration of His life and most of all celebration of the fact that He has given us new life. It’s not really whether we go to Church or not but about us taking time out to ask what impact Easter has on the way we live our life. Its amazes me how He wilfully gave his life just for love. Do you know anyone who would die for you? I say NO; because our love is confined in time and His is eternal. For Him it was not the end but rather the beginning. Embrace that new Beginning!

How can this be related to everyday life I hear you say? Well let us think about how we feel in a happy relationship. Mull over a moment where an innocent winsome gesture stopped you in your tracks and changed your perception of love. In a second everything changed and it suddenly came to you ‘darnnnnnnnnn I love this man (or woman)’. It doesn’t happen all the time but at that moment life is great, everything looks good and feels right because you love someone so much and you know they love you back.

Now multiply that feeling by 10 a million times. Are you excited yet?
Can you imagine that perpetual feeling of love and happiness? It’s indescribable. I am excited because I have tasted some of that love and I can testify that nothing comes close.

I am looking forward to Easter this year because I am surrounded by people who understand the essence of Easter as a demonstration of love and a fulfilment of purpose. This weekend I’ll bask in the fullness of the knowledge of His love.

Have a wonderful Easter.
Love Always,

Suzy Peaches

Suzy Peaches' Fruit Basket (Issues #5 and #6)

Enrich to Outreach

Hey guys, sorry I have been incognito for a bit, had so much work to do it has been unreal. I’m glad that you enjoyed my facetious promenade down Singleton Street and a very big thank you to everyone that filled in the grid. I feel it served its purpose of prompting you to cogitate on your attitude towards your personal life.

I’ll try as much as possible not to pontificate my views, which are inextricable from my biblical beliefs.

Summary of Grid: I could see that we do not refer to our single status disparagingly but rather embrace it. It was also evident that we are looking to learn from our experiences, which are invariably preparing us for our move into Coupleville.

What next – Find love. As Lady A rightly stated in affairs of the heart it is important concentrate on self-development and improvement. We all say we are “Looking for Love” but do you realise the converse needs to be true. You are also the love that someone else is looking for and if you were to find you would you call you love. Let me re-phrase that would you want to spend the rest of your life with you?

My Thought

Our Model for Finding Love:

1. Find the right person
2. Fall in love
3. Unconsciously fix our hopes & dreams on this person and be disappointed when they fail us.
4. If failure repeatedly occurs repeat steps 1, 2, & 3

God’s Model for Love:

1. Become the right person by mimicking God
2. Walk in love
3. Fix your hope on God and seek to please him through your relationship with others
4. If failure occurs repeat steps 1, 2 & 3.
   
   

The Word

“Therefore, be imitators of God as beloved children. Walk and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us as a fragrant offering and a sacrifice to God”. Eph. 5:1-2 (for more read chapter 4:31 – 32).

I’m sure you are wondering why I have put a spiritual spin on this
relationship issue. In response I ask you this question – Can you separate God
& Life?

The key to finding the right person, is not finding the right person, but by becoming the right person. We must consciously stop ourselves from waiting to be completed by someone else and instead realize that only God can provide what each of us needs to be complete. So from today let us try hard to become imitators of God and Walk in Love and in so doing, the intentional and sacrificial love Paul was referring to, which wills and provides us what is best, will follow.

Beginning today abandon the mindset of searching for love and instead start making a conscious effort to moving away from the way we are accustomed to finding love which focuses too much on finding the right person or modelling someone into the person we want. This model problematically places too much emphasis on finding the right person, and isolates our task of becoming the right people, and God’s role in creating and keeping the relationship.

Meditation for the Week

1 Corinthians 13 : 4 - 7

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Now replace Love & it with your name – and read out loud.

Suzy is patient and kind. Suzy is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Suzy does not demand its own way. Suzy is not irritable, and Suzy keeps no record of being wronged. Suzy does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Suzy never gives up, never loses faith, Suzy is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Are these statements still true? I guess we all have our work cut out. Till next week its Suzy here saying …………… Love till love finds you!