Suzy Peaches' Fruit Basket

Hello my lovely readers I am Suzy Peaches and I’ll be with you today and every Thursday with fruity treats to usher in the weekend. I would like to use this opportunity to thank Mona for allowing me run riot on her blog for the day. Seeing as Valentines Day is round the corner I thought it would be nice to explore our avenues of love.

Here it goes ……………

Unrequited Love

Do you remember the agonies of Unrequited Love? Do you remember the love that dare not speak its name because you couldn’t bear to declare your passion to the object of your affection? I ask again do you remember the pining, yearning, burning and aching desires you had for someone who never thought of you in that light or worse still knew that you existed?

Today let's talk about the torches that we’ve carried for years and years.
For the love that would have been but never was;
For the One that got away;
For the One that still when you hear their name everything prickles, the hairs on the back of your neck, your heart pounds and your palms get sweaty;
For the One whose name can set you all aflame, all aglow and all aglimmer. Let's talk about Unrequited Love!

Oh No! I’m not talking about the one you cupped off with at the back of staff quarters on Inter-house sports day. I am not talking about the one that you dated for many years and maybe ended up marrying (or soon to marry). I am talking of Unrequited Love – the one you never kissed – the love that after all these years you still wished had flamed into something more enduring – the love you never ever tasted. Years ago we used to call the crushes.

I hear you asking why is this nutter banging on about CRUSHES? Well according to Libby Pervis a renowned Writer and Journalist and I quote “We have lost the facility these days for something as romantic as Unrequited Love”. Does this story dredge up and feelings?

He was 24, I was 17 he was the wisest handsome man that ever earned a girl’s worship. He simply could do no wrong, he was the only star in my sky – one smile from him could keep going for months. And there is no need to worry about embarrassing him now because He was never even aware of my silent spooky devotion. This silent infatuation was not unusual neither did it come without innumerable precedence. Hopes Undiluted – Unrequited Love was once a staple of literature and song and it is only recently that it has gone out of fashion. Somehow it drifted of the radar of popular western culture and imagination and has been driven into the wilderness by the brisk forces of modernity. What was once considered a sacred human feeling has become a weird and contemptible weakness.

The troubadour, the courtly lover begging for single rose becomes the stalker of today’s time. These days we are told that if the person does not reciprocated your feelings then immediately “move on”, “get over it”, “get some closure”, “get rid of the baggage and find someone who will love you back”. Which is all well and good, as nobody in his or her right mind should keep pinning for the love of another who did not share their passion.

But for just a day let's forget about what ought to be the case, or what should be the case and concentrate on what sometimes is the case. Lets free our romantic inclinations and indulge our fantasies. It could be anything from your Idol to A friend or even a Friend of a Friend.
Here is an extract from John Donne’s Poem The Damp for inspiration:

WHEN I am dead, and doctors know not why,
And my friends' curiosity
Will have me cut up to survey each part,
When they shall find your picture in my heart,
You think a sudden damp of love

I’ve told you mine it’s your turn now!


Aramide said...

This is sweet, something we either run from or talk about less these days.....real undiluted, unrequited love...does it exist everywhere though? What with traumas and experiences what people have gone through, have they closed their eyes/hearts to the simpler things in life? Tell me Suzy :o)

Anonymous said...

That was very Poignant for this time of year. I especially appreciate the plain truth of it all. No airs and graces, no fancy frills, just the plain message that it sucks loving someone who does not love you. I think it is actually easier when you are a stranger to the object of your affection, when they are not aware of how you feel. Then one can just continue to bask in the fantasy of a world where you and lover are one. I must say that the former tends to hurt the heart abit more than it can manage...Suzy can I get a holler please :0)

Aramide said...

Pink Panther could you kindly return my unrequited Bradley please? Thank you...

@ Sue - Holler!

Where is Suzy P? Probably skiving again....

Naija Vixen said...

Im feeling this post Suzy..made me cringe in recognition!cant spill sorry...but i agree wiv Pink Panther bout the unrequited yearnings...except in me own case Boris Kodjo is pining for me too...he's just waitn for the perfect moment to leave Nicole;-)

Anonymous said...

To be honest, this unrequited love debate is making me feel kinda... well, I really cant say online. I am sorta back in the realms of unrequited loving again, my lover knows me, but knows not of my love. I'm kinda enjoying the feeling at the moment actually. (girlie giggles of excitement)hmnnn....okay ladies, do I need help??

and where the hell is suzy p??

Anon said...

Unrequited love...oh the things that I could say about that. But it does suck, I've only experienced it once. Although, in a way it was requited...but it was just that we never actually said it to each other. So that wasn't cool lol.

But in response to Mona asking me, I'm actually not from Calabar :-/ sorry lol.

Anonymous said...

James Blunt song...YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL is about unrequited love

TMinx said...

I think I'm a hopeless romantic. I have suffered from unrequited love once. It took a few years to actually shake myself out of the situation. That s**t messes one up big time. Thank God for Jesus lol.

snazzy said...

hey lova was about unrequited love as well. So was excuse me miss (kinda). So anon is right it isn't gone from our culture. Even Lost in Translation was about that in a way. Though of course ms. p was right in that u r expected to get over it right quick.

I think we don't focus on unrequited love cos at the end of the day we like a happy ending. Even that boyz II men song "Girl in the life magazine" had to end happily. Cos of course tons of models fall in love with fans that write them letters.

Anonymous said...

Welcome Back... Welcome Back ... Guess whose BACK? Really enjoyed my 2 unofficial days off work last week. And I appreciate your comments - It's nice to know that I am not the only romantic out there!
@ Naija Vixen - with you on the Boris Kodjoe thing I could have all ten of that Man's babies - lol.
Neways just thought I should Holla. Keep it comming. Is anyone out the bold enough to name a friend?!!!

Noni Moss said...

Oh how many stories can I tell? Lolll - I used to be "boy crazy" as they said back in the day. I always had a crush on one person or another. Most of them were missed opportunities as either they liked me when i lost interest or vice versa.But I think the only unrequited one that comes to mind is my friend's older brother. Loll - i would start hyperventilating in his presence. talk about stammering and blushing, and grinning stupidly if he soo much as talked to me or noticed me. Loll - it must have been quite embarrasing for the poor guy. At one time I carved on my desk in school, Noni loves ---- and ofcourse someone spotted it and told everyone.

I eventually grew out of it - he started dating some of my friends, I dated some of his friends and we are good friends now. :-D I wonder if he remembers? Lolll

jak said...

If I thought really hard, I could probably come up with at least 5 or so. Off the top of my head there's this particular one - that still nags till today...

Anonymous said...

Love...hmmm d 1st thing that springs to my mind is: does it truly exist??(apart from parental & Godly) or is it just infactuation coupled with d desire to make urself n ur partner blive u r capable of loving?? (if dat makes sense)...anyway i guess wot im tryin to say is, like faith, some people turn to love when they r desperate for some sanity or just plain prob just chattin b*@#...i aint a believer in love, wud like 2 blive it does exist thow, too much hatred in today's world.

Anonymous said...

@ Lakeside - I will just like to point out that there is Love. I believe in Love as much ad I believe in God otherwise what would be the essence of Life. Actually I take that back for fear of starting a whole new debate.
I agree with you on people turning to love out of desperation. But then again there is nothing wrong with that as long as it is the right kind of love - the kind of love only God can shower on you.
Neways that’s just my opinion.